Ever wanted something so bad you were willing to do anything to achieve it? Ever prayed so hard for that one thing that you thought you needed so badly and after much longer than anticipated, if it were so willed, it came to fulfillment. Perhaps even at the moment or manner you were least expecting?
A few years back, while driving around with our mother in law, we began to discuss a matter, to which I can hardly remember the topic, but it led her to the above phrase, “Dios nos purifica con la espera y nos da las cosas purificadas.” In English “God purifies us with the wait and gives us those things purified”. Sometimes we idolize things in life; so much the desire for that thing in life becomes our main focus. It is in the waiting for that “thing” that it becomes cleansed. It should be noted, our mother in law is a catechism teacher.
It should also be noted, that we, your girls, while Catholic, were not raised in stoutly religious households. We lay no claim to being well versed in the bible. But that changes no part of our testimony! We’ve had many moments in our lives where we plan things and expect them to go a certain way, to no avail. Not even with your best efforts. We recount those moments and how they panned out:
Pregnancy
Erica’s Story
This is a tough one! Especially when one feels ready to start a family-or continue a family- and it doesn’t happen as quickly as expected. When we tried for our first child, it didn’t happen right away. Its easy to feel pity for yourself, or envy for others because “I’m in the right place in life. So and so aren’t in the right place, but there they are, pregnant!” But when that pregnancy did come along, so did an approval for a construction loan. And wouldn’t you know it, by the time we moved in, we were halfway through the 3rd trimester with enough time to spare for unpacking! And just before being put on bed rest for pre-eclampsia!
Marian’s Story
In my case, continuing the family hasn’t been as easy as you would think. You have a plan, and you calculate when its “the best” time to come out pregnant with your second or third child. You do the math and you start trying, thinking, its going to be just as fast it was with the first one. But then it doesn’t happen. Months pass by and you question yourself and God. And then you pray. And then another month passes by. To which you pray some more, but in the end you just have to wait because the Lord’s timing is perfect. Within that wait our son learned to sleep through the night (mind you we’ve been struggling with his sleeping habits since forever and through this, we grew closer together as a couple). I am sure that when that blessing comes we will be ready to receive it with open arms and well rested minds and bodies.
Conception after Loss
Erica’s Story
How great the feeling of entitlement to conceive than after a loss of pregnancy. And it sucks. When we decided to go for a 3rd child, we made the decision hastily. Then we conceived right away! And then 10 weeks in, we lost it. (I would not be offended to explain this situation if any one would have any questions). Even though the doctor said we could try again soon, there was bleeding irregularly for 4 months and on the fifth month, we were pregnant. I’m not complaining; that’s not what this post is about. That time trying to conceive was still fast. (We know many suffer emotionally and physically on the road to conception). But in those moments, when you feel like you are “owed” a baby, it’s tough to see past that. Had we not gone through this, we wouldn’t have grown as a couple, in the quality of our little family and we wouldn’t have our little guy.
Career
Erica’s Story
At the beginning of our engagement, my husband tried desperately to find a job, out of state, as we were tired of the cold. But for every interview, there were zero offers. So what did we do, sit around and mope!? Not a chance! He took his Master’s degree and went straight to work as a stock boy, until a few months later, he finally received the job opportunity he was waiting for. Only it was in the same location we resided, no warmer weather for us! Had it been out of state, the kids wouldn’t be close to their grandparents, or my brothers who were still little kids at the time. We wouldn’t have the amazing friends we have, and may not be living close to Marian and Ernesto.
Marian’s Story
Some of us might be searching for more; a dream job or a promotion in your career. For me, it was being able to put in practice what I’d studied for the most part of my life. I prayed so much during med school it’s not even funny! One of the big desires was being able to do part of my internship rotation here in the states. We were competing for a limited amount of spots and I remember praying alongside one of my best friends and making promises with God. In the end, the students picked were those who were wealthy and had better known last names! I remember feeling devastated, insulted and hurt. But little did I know, in the last moment something changed and we ended up with the opportunity to travel to Florida for the rotation. I remember telling my friend “God has a weird sense of humor.” I enjoyed my rotation and I appreciated it so much. Now the next big item I am still waiting for is to be able to enter a residency program and be able to climb that step in my career as Doctor. But again, in that wait, I’ve met marvelous people, learned new skills and things I didn’t even know I was into like DIY projects and web design. I’ve had a beautiful baby boy and I am enjoying my family. Which for me is a big one after coming from a home where my mom was working 24/7 to provide and my dad was hardworking as well.
Look, friends, these are difficult and isolating times to say the least. We don’t pretend to know God’s plans, but we are fervent in our faith and the hope we have is rooted in the times in life where we’ve experienced “Dios purificando las cosas.” During these times, we all need to try to find the little positive things around us and help others spot them too. Above all support each other. Be thankful for what we have now because only God knows what is in his plan for us. Be patient in the wait.
We hope this post will give you hope and let you see that even though everyone is going through a tough time right now we are still blessed. Share with us what you think, have you had something purified? Are you still waiting on something?